Overthinking. The irony in writing about this topic is that I kept overthinking it. What direction should I take? What tips should I offer? Where can I find the best research? What if my post doesn’t hold up against the others?

Overthinking, along with its siblings and , is common in gifted kids. and the mind not being able to ever really turn off. Gifted kids also tend to have lots of channels in their brains, meaning more information to mull over and think about, easily leading to overthinking.

As a chronic overthinker, I wanted to explore the reasons behind overthinking, how it can hurt and what we can do to rein it in.

Why do we overthink?

Why does this happen in the first place? Why do our brains run wild? In an article published in entitled “Why We Worry,” science writer Victoria Stern did a deep dive into the causes behind chronic overthinking. In summary: it’s all about control.

“Chronic worriers operate under the misperception that their overthinking and attempts at controlling every situation allow them to problem-solve and plan for the future,” said Stern. “Instead their thought pattern hinders cognitive processing and also causes overstimulation of emotion- and fear-processing areas in the brain.”

Overthinking and worrying trick our brains into believing that we are preparing for any situation, that we can handle any outcome, positive or negative. In reality, while this may work in the short-term, it ultimately harms us.

Dr. Michael Stein, a psychologist based in Denver, . When we experience this fear our brain jumps into “analysis mode” and starts beginning to prepare and think over every outcome. This thinking ignites our minds and creates a temporary comfort to deal with uncertainty.

The Problem of Overthinking

In addition to driving us bonkers, overthinking has negative effects on our mental and physical health.

A study from the Journal of Abnormal Psychology noted that , increasing the risk of mental health problems.  This can often cause the overthinker to fall into a viscous cycle of ruminating more and more while their mental health is declining.

Unsurprisingly, . To self-treat that distress, some overthinkiners resort to unhealthy coping strategies, like alcohol, food or addictive substances. It can also lead to a negative mood, anger and irritability. Overthinking can have physical effects, as well. , since the mind often won’t turn off even for sleep. It can also lead to an increased heart rate and other .

How Do We Stop?

If only I knew! Breaking the habit of overthinking is difficult, but here are some strategies you can try.

• Take Action
  If you are a chronic overthinker, you probably have a tendency to get stuck in the “analysis” phase of a situation. , even if it’s small, can help bust the overthinking cycle. For example, if you are overthinking about applying to college, start drafting an essay or working on your resume or even filling out a practice application. The act of doing something can get you out of your thoughts.
• Mindfulness
  Mindfulness takes practice, but has many benefits, . This meditation practice emphasizes focusing on the present moment, not the future or the past, which can help us disconnect from worry. Mindfulness has known to be in calming intensities. Try bookending your practice with .
• Busy Yourself
  Sometimes simply can do the trick to calm a busy mind. Absorb yourself in a hobby, whether that be exercise, crafting or playing with your family. Or get some household chores done to engage your attention elsewhere. Even getting lost in a book or movie (especially if it’s theme is disconnected from your worries) can help.
• Rename Your Thoughts
  Rename your thoughts with what they really are: self-doubt, anxiety, fear. This may help you to and bring your thinking down a level to really focus on the actual problem at hand.

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When I saw the topic for this month’s blog hop was “Emotional Intelligence” I have to admit I was a bit stumped. Not a topic with which I’m very familiar, I was overwhelmed with the possibility of having to write an informed blog post. So, I turned to the trusty Google search and did some digging. It did not disappoint.

I found several articles on all facets of emotional intelligence (EQ), from how it affects your career to its signs in gifted children. Rather than merging these together in a hodgepodge of my own thoughts, I wanted to share the ones I found most useful. Hopefully, these will be helpful to those who are in the same place I was.

Definitions of Emotional Intelligence

This short primer from the University of New Hampshire gives a basic definition of emotional intelligence, along with a glossary of terms related to the subject. Perfect if you are strapped for time and want a one-minute read.

On the other end of the spectrum, the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence is full of resources about emotional intelligence and its effects on our lives. They even host events to share recent research and announcements. Great for those who want to dive deep into the subject.

A helpful article from Psychology Today for those like me who think best in broken-down categories. The author reviews misconceptions about emotional intelligence common in the larger media. He also gives a brief overview of study he and a colleague conducted to measure emotional intelligence in children.

A list of common traits of those with EQ coupled with brief explanations. Since the article is published on the career site Inc., it also notes studies that have found those with high emotional intelligence tend to be star performers in the work place.

Emotional Intelligence and Society

The author of this Atlantic article explains how the trait can be used for “evil,” particularly in the workplace. He explores studies conducted in workplaces that have found some employees with high EQ possess almost Machiavellian tendencies.  A very interesting read on the dangerous power of manipulation.

This feature from the New York Times highlights Northern California schools that attempt to teach elementary-age children to be emotionally intelligent. I was fascinated by the methods the schools used and the debate over whether or not they are effective.

Emotional Intelligence and Gifted Children

A well-rounded piece from the Davidson Institute that emphasizes the importance of being attentive to the emotional development and needs of the gifted child. I appreciated the fact that the author acknowledged the common in the population and how they can be harnessed to ensure a child thrives.

Brainy Child provides another overview of emotional intelligence, but this one specifically relates to gifted children. Parents will appreciated the list of tips for developing EQ in the gifted, as well as notes on common emotional stressors and how to overcome them.

More tips, this time from SENG, on how to nurture emotional intelligence in your gifted child. The author specifically advocates for a hands-on but not helicopter approach, guiding the child while allowing them to learn and grow on their own.

What are your favorite resources about emotional intelligence?

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