SAT – Institute for Educational Advancement Connecting bright minds; nurturing intellectual and personal growth Wed, 29 May 2024 19:38:25 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.9.4 /wp-content/uploads/2021/12/ieafavicon-e1711393443795-150x150.png SAT – Institute for Educational Advancement 32 32 CDB Class of ’21 – College Plans /blog-cdb-class-of-21-college-plans/ /blog-cdb-class-of-21-college-plans/#respond Tue, 25 May 2021 03:18:16 +0000 https://ieadev.wpengine.com/blog-cdb-class-of-21-college-plans/ By Bonnie Raskin

There鈥檚 little disagreement that the past year-plus has had its share of challenges and obstacles brought on by the pandemic. While few demographics were spared, student were hit especially hard by the demands of virtual school and the almost complete lack of campus and outside activities and socialization with friends and classmates. Until very recently, this year鈥檚 graduating class of high school seniors were pretty much 鈥渇lying blind鈥 to quote a CDB Scholar when it came to visiting any college and university. And those rare campuses that did allow visitors on site offered no campus tours, in person interviews or informational sessions outside of Zoom webinars, with their student community attending virtual classes.

High school seniors also faced the reality that many of the nation鈥檚 highly selective colleges and universities dealt with a surge in applications, as the previously mandated SAT and ACT tests were optional for the 2021 application year. This resulted in applicants who previously would not have met test standards stipulated at certain universities and colleges took the attitude of 鈥渨hat do I have to lose?鈥 and applied to schools that in another year might have been out of reach by virtue of their test scores.

In spite of this changing college application landscape, the CDB high school seniors鈥攖he class of 2021鈥攑ersevered and figured out alternative ways to conduct their college research. As a class, they applied to over sixty colleges and universities in the United States and abroad. Many of the senior Scholars reached out to CDB alumni who currently attend the colleges and universities they were interested in learning more about from insiders at the various schools. I was delighted to hear back from many CDB seniors that the CDB alumni not only responded to their inquiries by phone, email and Zoom sessions, but also reached out to them to let the seniors know who they were and what particular schools they attend to start a dialogue. As more schools opened up in April and May, some of the seniors were able to visit the colleges where they were admitted and meet with CDB alums in person鈥攎asked and safely socially distanced.

This year鈥檚 CDB seniors will matriculate to colleges and universities throughout the United States and abroad, schools that match their academic interests and offer them the opportunity to pursue ongoing areas of interest as well as many course possibilities to explore. One CDB  Scholar will be taking a gap year and plans to pursue advanced educational and service projects before starting college in 2022. Another CDB Scholar will be attending Oxford University in England.

CDB Scholars from the class of 2021 have been recognized with multiple academic, service and achievement awards and recognition including Presidential Scholars, National Merit Scholar Finalists, Valedictorians and Saluditorians of their class as well as matriculating to honors programs at their upcoming colleges and universities.

CDB welcomed ten new schools and programs to our international list of colleges and universities attended by CDB Scholars since the inaugural class of 2002 Scholars. Here is a list of the schools and programs the CDB class of 2021 will attend this coming fall. Several Scholars are still deciding among their admission options:

  • Brown University
  • Brown University鈥檚 PLME program (an eight year program for students who are committed to a career in medicine and who also want a broad liberal arts education)
  • Bryn Mawr College
  • Columbia University
  • California University of Technology
  • Columbia University
  • Georgetown University
  • George Washington University
  • Harvard College
  • Macalister College
  • Oxford University
  • Stanford University
  • University of Florida Stamps Scholar Program
  • University of Pennsylvania
  • University of Pennsylvania Management and Technology Program
  • University of Texas  Agriculture and Mechanical Honors Program
  • Washington and Lee University
  • Webb Institute
  • Wellesley College
  • Whitman College

 

The 优蜜视频 and CDB communities wish our graduating high School seniors a successful and engaging next chapter of their lives and look forward to staying in contact with them as they continue to thrive.

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Preview Patsy Kumekawa’s New Book with Unreleased Chapter “Lessons” /blog-preview-patsy-kumekawas-new-book-with-preview-chapter-lessons/ /blog-preview-patsy-kumekawas-new-book-with-preview-chapter-lessons/#respond Wed, 27 May 2020 00:04:11 +0000 https://ieadev.wpengine.com/blog-preview-patsy-kumekawas-new-book-with-preview-chapter-lessons/ Patsy Kumekawa and her husband Michael are well known in the gifted community through their organization, Scholar Search Associates.听 For several years, 优蜜视频 has partnered with Scholar Search to represent our organization and programs at various school fairs and gifted conferences throughout the country. Below, Patsy has allowed 优蜜视频 to release a chapter from her new book! 听

Lessons

Experience is certainly among the best of all teachers. I also believe that learning from the wrong turns we take can cement the knowledge we gain even more firmly.

Shortly after our son was born, a cousin sent us a parcel with items that her son had used when he was little. Included in the package were some hand-me-down clothes for special occasions and a set of magnetic letters of the alphabet to be placed on the refrigerator. As our child was still a toddler, it didn鈥檛 occur to me to employ the letters as an educational tool. Instead, I stuck them on the fridge as they were colorful and also could be used to hang photos and grocery lists. Later our son became intrigued with the letters and on his own discovered the magic of magnets. The letters swiftly joined blocks and other objects he could manipulate and use for construction or add as flavoring to the dinky car soup he regularly concocted. Somewhere in the mix of our playing, we began to ascribe names to the letters, just as we did to anything our son touched, saw, heard, and otherwise experienced. We knew that he could identify and distinguish letters and even write his name. However, it wasn鈥檛 until he dazzled the twelve year old boy who was visiting us by pointing to the doormat and spelling out the word, 鈥淲ELCOME鈥 that it became apparent how much he had internalized.

After he began to routinely and excitedly spell and occasionally recognize words he saw on billboards and in print, I had the idea that formal reading lessons were in order. So, using a Dr. Seuss book as a primer, I encouraged my pupil to sound out the letters and identify the words. In short order, annoyance and frustration supplanted excitement and it was abundantly clear that teaching reading at this point was causing unnecessary tension and serving no purpose. This experience taught the would-be teacher an invaluable lesson; that learning is best achieved when the child is ready and receptive. Further, educational initiatives, especially for young children, have greatest effect when they are natural extensions of play. Perhaps the most important lesson here, though, is that education is most successful when it is a natural outgrowth of a child鈥檚 own curiosity, rather than when it is imposed.

I strongly believe that if a parent pays attention to his or her child, then that parent will not only know when to widen the child鈥檚 horizons, but also in what way. I am reminded of the time when our son was a kindergartener that we brought home and watched as a family the movie 1776. Certainly, that musical has some catchy, if not moving, tunes and rich and feisty characters. Yet it was clear that our son was most drawn to the story underpinning the film, the birth of our nation, our history. Seeing his enthusiasm about early American history, in turn, inspired my husband and me to find ways to fuel his interest and expand his understanding. We discovered a wonderful series of books that follows generations of a fictional family from Colonial America through to the War of 1812. We were implored to read these books practically non-stop and we spent a large portion of one summer under the massive maple tree in our backyard learning about America in its early decades. Our son鈥檚 interest and knowledge continued to grow and we later spent countless mealtimes reading; about military engagements and novels like The Red Badge of Courage that describe the horrors of war. We made treks to Plymouth and Independence Hall to provide a visual understanding of the places where American history unfolded. The point is that our family鈥檚 quests and intellectual journeys were sparked by the excitement our son showed while watching 1776. We just sought to sustain and develop that interest to wherever it led us. It wouldn鈥檛 surprise me if our son鈥檚 decision to major in history years later was in part rooted in those positive encounters he had with Colonial America as a young child.

Now, while I think it grossly unfair 鈥 if not cruel 鈥 to willfully subject a child to a challenge well beyond his or her physical and mental ability, I don鈥檛 think that a parent should prevent a child from experiencing any sort of difficulty or from trying something new. Indeed, some of the most flexible and creative thinkers are those who have had to find ways to address and overcome disappointments and handle the unfamiliar. Facing some modicum of challenge makes for healthy development.

There is a memorable scene from the film, Babies, a documentary that follows four babies from around the world from their births until they begin to walk. In this clip, a months-old girl is sitting on the floor and concentrating on stringing large plastic square-, triangle- and circle-shaped beads onto a pole. She manages to get all the beads on the pole and excitedly lifts the pole only to watch the beads she had painstakingly threaded slide off the other end of the pole and onto the floor. Then she does what I wish I could do in polite company when something or someone is driving me nuts. She hurls herself on her back, kicks her feet in midair, and screams. You don鈥檛 need a thought bubble to know what she鈥檚 feeling. However, what happened next was a marvel to see. After a short, heartfelt wail, the girl sat up, crawled back to the pole and beads and tried it all again.

Long way around, the time for parents to encourage their child to take another step in development is when that child shows evident signs that he or she not only is interested, but also possesses the requisite maturity or patience to make the effort. This applies equally to learning to ride a bike, read, or use a toilet.

A famous study, colloquially known as the marshmallow test, elaborates on this notion of patience or, more specifically, the ability to delay gratification. In the 1960s and 1970s, a psychologist, then a professor at Stanford, conducted a series of tests on pre-school and early primary school students. The young students were told that they could either have one marshmallow (or Oreo or pretzel stick) immediately or wait fifteen minutes and receive several of these treats. This cohort of students was then tracked over decades. Curiously, the students who delayed gratification generally achieved more positive life outcomes, e.g. higher educational attainment, greater ability to handle stress, healthier body mass index, and perhaps of most importance to those parents who possessed academic ambitions for their child, much higher standardized test scores than those who enjoyed the one marshmallow (or treat) immediately.

The marshmallow test was largely debunked by later studies that maintained that the ability to hold out for more marshmallows was shaped by a child鈥檚 social and economic background, rather than by his or her inherent patience or resilience. Still, although the marshmallow test was designed to measure young children鈥檚 degree of self control, it actually provides a useful moral for parents. The experiment captured so much attention because it purported to predict a child鈥檚 degree of success, as determined by certain adults, a decade or more down the line. But, in the big picture, why should parents even be thinking about how their four year olds will fare on the SAT, for example, a dozen or more years in the future? Perhaps it鈥檚 the parents that ought to think about ways to exercise patience and refrain from eating the proverbial marshmallow themselves. Rather than to rush their children鈥檚 development for the possibility of achieving a certain vision of success, parents need to wait and see where their children鈥檚 interests and curiosities lie and then take steps to fuel that initial excitement accordingly. This brings me back to the lesson I learned in deciding to teach our son to read before he was ready.

Because my husband and I are self-employed and have the luxury of a fair amount of flexibility in our schedule, at least one of us was available to be with our child from his birth. When both of us were free, we tended to travel as a threesome, whether to the grocery store, library, or the backyard. It鈥檚 not surprising that all this time together helped to forge our close-knit family. Also, as we were close, we valued and sought our son鈥檚 opinions. As such, he weighed in on family-related decisions, including where we might eat out on those infrequent occasions when we opted not to cook. We generally frequented inexpensive, fast food places. As our son grew older and could express his preferences, we would take turns deciding where we should dine. This was taken quite seriously and a record was kept as to whose turn it was so that there was parity in decision-making. All this is to explain that from a very early age, our son鈥檚 choices and views mattered, especially when they concerned his own experience.

The time came when we decided to look into pre-schools with programs that ran just a couple of mornings or afternoons a week. Our motivation to explore pre-schools was largely for the social experiences they offer. As our son was and is an only child, we thought he might benefit from the chance to meet and interact with others his age. Several friends had recommended a school that their children attended. It happened that a significant number of families affiliated with this nursery school also were associated with a leading university located nearby. We figured that if academics enrolled their children in this place, it must have some merit. The day of the pre-school鈥檚 open house arrived and prospective students and their parents swarmed into the facility, listened attentively to the teacher as she described the program and its approach, noted the furnishings and toys, and sought clues about the essence of the place. It was clear that here, education, specifically academic schooling, was valued. It was also clear that the target of the teacher鈥檚 attention at the gathering was the parents, rather than the prospective students. Whenever the teacher spoke to a child, her tone seemed to lack genuine warmth and, worse, her manner was patronizing. We鈥檇 been in the building all of ten minutes when our son quietly started asking when we would leave. The signal was unambiguous. He wanted out.

A few days later, we visited a public nursery program run out of the local recreation center where we had been invited to stop by any time the pre-school was in session. When we arrived, a group of children was happily navigating Big Wheels around their classmates in the airy, though relatively small space that housed the school. Spying an unoccupied vehicle, our son asked if he could join the fun. With a nod from the teacher, he climbed on the Big Wheels and pedaled away beaming. Guess in which program we enrolled our son. It so happened that this pre-school also had a valuable educational component. The students were exposed to the rudiments of language and arithmetic and they were read stories about Native Americans and dinosaurs, but the approach was low-key and inviting. We were also pleased that our son made some fast friends with whom he played routinely inside and outside his school. Our family鈥檚 experience at this pre-school opened my husband鈥檚 and my eyes to the importance of early education, not only what was taught, but how. Looking back I realize that the pre-school teachers reinforced the way we ourselves interacted with and engaged our son at home, by sharing our excitement about our own interests and discovering and identifying the topics and activities that tickled and fueled his own imagination. The pre-school experience also served to motivate us to partner with our son鈥檚 teachers down the line to try to echo the approach he was fortunate to have experienced in his very first formal schooling.

Now back to the subject of decision-making and the reason for talking about our son鈥檚 pre-school in the first place. I suppose that our son could have had a positive time in the first program we visited. There had to be a reason the pre-school was so highly touted by those who were affiliated with it. However, even if my husband and I hadn鈥檛 been put off by what we had observed at the open house, the most compelling factor and what clinched the decision to choose the program we did was the way our son responded to the options before him and his excitement to attend the school he preferred. I have absolutely no doubt that if a child is comfortable about a school, then that is the place to pursue. In fact, this is my mantra with respect to educational choices and following it has always served me well. First, no matter how wonderful an institution or educational program seems on paper, I think it is essential to visit the school and witness it in action. Second, you may never be able to explain why a particular pre-school, program, or even college feels right, but if it does, then it is right. Conversely, even if a school can boast an impressive array of graduates or possesses state of the art facilities and eye-popping resources, if your child doesn鈥檛 feel right about the place, then the school 颈蝉苍鈥檛 right. For us, the pre-school decision-making process solidified what we always intuitively knew. Our son鈥檚 feelings and views were essential ingredients in determining what next step to take when it concerned him, even where to eat for dinner.

Patsy Kumekawa

May 18, 2020

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Alumni Interview: 优蜜视频’s Pipeline Program /blog-alumni-interview-ieas-pipeline-program/ /blog-alumni-interview-ieas-pipeline-program/#respond Tue, 03 Oct 2017 14:29:54 +0000 https://ieadev.wpengine.com/blog-alumni-interview-ieas-pipeline-program/ was a pilot program developed by 优蜜视频 in partnership with the Pasadena Unified School District (PUSD) and Avery Dennison Foundation. Designed specifically to serve highly able, underserved youth in PUSD, the program ran from 1999 to 2010.听The program provided gifted middle and high school students in PUSD with enrichment classes, Personal Education Plans, and other services, and stressed strong relationships among students, teachers, parents, Program Coordinators and enrichment teachers.

We interviewed alum Niles Owens about his experience in the program and how it shaped his life as a student.

How did you become involved in 优蜜视频鈥檚 Pipeline program?
I believe I was selected around the time I was beginning middle school. It seemed like a great opportunity that my parents supported me pursuing.

What challenges did you face in your schooling experience?
When I got to [University of California, Riverside], it was hard for me to keep up with the pace of the quarter system. I went in thinking I was going to take 20 units a quarter and graduate early. I was hit with a dose of reality almost immediately. It would have made more sense for me to start slow and work my way up once I better understood how to keep up with the pace. This was not new for me because I had the same issue transitioning from elementary to middle school and middle school to high school.

How do you think this program changed your schooling experience and outlook towards education?
The program had a way of breaking things down more than my teachers had the opportunity or time to do. The program either offered extra help, or gave new information sooner than I would have gotten it in school. Because of that, I had a definite advantage in math, arts, and听 the SAT鈥檚.

How did the Pipeline program prepare you for college, your career, and/or adulthood?
It definitely gave me the opportunity to get more attention with teachers who were experts in their field. I remember the SAT Prep instructor helped improve my score over 200 points. He broke things down and helped me understand how the exam is scored and even what the graders look for in the writing portion. This helped me to understand that even if I鈥檓 good at something, it never hurts to have someone else help you improve something that you may already be good at.

Do you have a favorite memory from the Pipeline program?
Nothing was more memorable than the college tours. The classes were fun and always informative, but the college tours helped put everything together. I hadn鈥檛 had much exposure to college campuses until taking the trips with the Pipeline program. I can鈥檛 put into words how eye-opening of an experience those were for my friends and I. Some schools that I had not previously considered became strong contenders for enrollment and others that were contenders may have been removed from my list based off those tours.

In what ways do you think programs like this benefit gifted and highly-able students in public schools?
I think that programs like this help gifted students in public schools by providing the additional help to stay focused in a setting where their needs aren鈥檛 as nurtured as they probably should be. It鈥檚 easy for a young person to get discouraged, but they can also be uplifted when they are put around like-minded individuals and instructors who can give them additional attention.

What advice, given your experience with Pipeline, would you give to gifted children and their families?
Take advantage of the opportunities that programs like this present. Visit colleges and universities anytime you can. Visit the ones you like and don鈥檛 like, because you might change your mind. Get help in subjects that you think you already have a good understanding in. Lastly, it鈥檚 never too early to start prepping for college.

What have you been up to since completing high school (college, career, etc.)?
After graduating from Pasadena High School in 2007, I graduated from UC Riverside in 2012 with a Bachelor鈥檚 in Media and Cultural Studies. After UCR, I graduated from Cal Baptist University in 2014 with a Master鈥檚 in Kinesiology with an emphasis in Sport Management. Currently, I work at UC Riverside鈥檚 Recreation Department as a Special Events and Operations Manager. I live in Moreno Valley, CA with my wife who I met while attending UCR.

I can honestly say that I owe a lot to the Pipeline program. If not for them, I might not have been as prepared as I was for high school and college.

If you are interested in learning more about the Pipeline to Success program or would like to speak with someone about bringing the program to your district, please visit the for more information.

Like this post?听听to receive more stories, information, and resources about gifted youth straight to your inbox.

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I Don鈥檛 Deserve This: Gifted Self-Doubt /blog-i-dont-deserve-this-gifted-self-doubt/ /blog-i-dont-deserve-this-gifted-self-doubt/#respond Wed, 04 Nov 2015 06:16:45 +0000 https://ieadev.wpengine.com/blog-i-dont-deserve-this-gifted-self-doubt/ By Jennifer Kennedy

I have a confession to make: I don鈥檛 always feel good enough to call myself gifted.

I was identified as gifted as a child, but I never really felt like that label belonged to me at all. Other kids were smarter than me. Other kids did better in school than me. I knew I was smart, but I didn鈥檛 feel gifted.

When I got older, I knew I wasn鈥檛 gifted. I mean, though I flew through advanced and accelerated math classes for years, I struggled when I got to precalculus. I didn鈥檛 really feel like I understood it, and the B I got in the class showed that, right? So, despite my teacher telling me I should move on to calculus the next year, I took AP Statistics and aced it. I was good at statistics, and I wasn鈥檛 going into any math or science fields in college, so why bother trying?

In college, I started feeling more comfortable with my advanced intellectual ability. I started seeing that I was different than most of my classmates. Encouraging and supportive professors helped me understand that the work I was producing was far beyond what was asked of me. 听I began believing that I might be gifted, after all.

So when I came across 优蜜视频, I jumped at the idea of advocating for kids like me. Then I started feeling again like I didn鈥檛 belong in that category. I looked at the descriptions of different courses available through the 优蜜视频 Academy and was intimidated. I looked at the Caroline D. Bradley Scholarship criteria and thought, 鈥淣o way would I have gotten a 500 on any section of the SAT in 7th grade.鈥 I listened to stories about the kids 优蜜视频 served and was just in awe. I still wanted to join the team to work to provide programs and services for these amazing kids, but I thought I had no business saying that I was like them.

That was until I learned about the pieces beyond intellectual ability that make up a gifted kid.

As I started to read about the characteristics of a gifted child and started learning about , I spent most of the time feeling an intense connection to these traits. I felt like I was getting to know myself as I was getting to know these kids, and I finally felt like certain things made sense. I felt less weird and more understood 鈥 because I am gifted. I may not understand the math and science that these kids discuss daily during 优蜜视频 programs (my talents and interests lie primarily in languages), but I am like them. I think differently. I learn differently. I feel things differently.

In fact, it is common for gifted individuals to experience Imposter Syndrome, or 鈥渧ague feelings of self-doubt, intellectual fraudulence and anxiety鈥. It makes them discount their success attributing it to luck, not real ability. Along with it comes the fear that anytime they could be found out鈥 ().听This often happens when things come so naturally to a gifted child for so long that when they are not immediately good at something or don鈥檛 understand a concept right away, they are plagued by the idea that maybe they never were that intelligent in the first place.

Even now, as I continue in the supportive and nurturing environment that is 优蜜视频, the feeling of being an imposter in this group of bright minds pulls at me on occasion. Sometimes, for example, when the band of gifted advocates gets into a conversation in response to an article or blog post, I don鈥檛 feel good enough to chime in. These are brilliant people, experts in the field, parents of these brilliant young kids. What value can my little voice add? Then I remind myself: I do belong here. I do deserve a voice.

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The Many Faces of Gifted: Sneha /blog-the-many-faces-of-gifted-sneha/ /blog-the-many-faces-of-gifted-sneha/#respond Wed, 25 Jun 2014 03:59:33 +0000 https://ieadev.wpengine.com/blog-the-many-faces-of-gifted-sneha/ By Carole Rosner

Every gifted person has a unique story. The following story is part of a series of posts depicting the many faces of gifted by highlighting gifted children and adults we have found through 优蜜视频 programs. 优蜜视频鈥檚 鈥 mentioned in this story 鈥 links gifted high school students from across the country with mentors who advance each participant鈥檚 skills through the application of knowledge and exposure to real world experiences.

SnehaC

Sneha Chidambaram
2013 Apprentice, Social Media and Media Relations, University of Southern California

鈥淎t first, I was definitely intimidated to enter into a real, adult workplace as a mere high school junior. But looking back, I feel this one nerve-wracking transition was what helped me gain more confidence in myself,鈥 high school senior Sneha explained about her 优蜜视频 Apprenticeship experience.

A counselor at an SAT Prep center told Sneha about 优蜜视频鈥檚 programs. 鈥淲hat interested me the most about 优蜜视频 Apprenticeship was the fact that I would be working one-on-one and alongside a professional in my desired field of study, business. After searching for numerous summer programs as an anxious high school junior interested in business, I felt that the Social Media and Media Relations Apprenticeship suited my interests perfectly, as it is the perfect opportunity for getting a snapshot into the business world.鈥

During her apprenticeship, Sneha conducted competitive market research on Facebook pages, websites, and Twitter feeds; developed a logo; and wrote a news release that was published on the USC News and USC Marshall School of Business websites.

I asked Sneha how she felt going back to high school after her Apprenticeship. 鈥淚n terms of academics, I feel my procrastination has reduced drastically, and I approach my tasks more methodically. I have definitely grown to plan effectively and manage my time more wisely!鈥

This summer, Sneha鈥檚 plans include 鈥渞elaxing, eating, shopping, and hanging out with my friends and family,鈥 before heading east to attend University of Pennsylvania鈥檚 Wharton School to study business. 鈥淎fter my Apprenticeship, I can definitely say that I fell in love with the corporate world, and I definitely intend to work in a corporate firm upon my college graduation. At this point in time, I am leaning more towards the financial sector, so I aspire to work in either a top investment banking firm, or maybe even a private equity firm!鈥

Sneha (second from left) with her Mentors and Apprenticeship alumnus Hunter at 优蜜视频’s Summer Spotlight 2013

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By the Numbers /blog-by-the-numbers/ /blog-by-the-numbers/#respond Wed, 06 Jun 2012 04:00:04 +0000 https://ieadev.wpengine.com/blog-by-the-numbers/ By Lisa Hartwig

Lisa is the mother of 3 gifted children who lives outside of San Francisco.

I feel responsible to a number: my son鈥檚 IQ score. I鈥檝e spent 9 years struggling with my relationship to it. I鈥檝e gone from feeling absolved of any responsibility to taking full responsibility for what the number means for his future. Eventually, I found a peaceful place in which the number and I can coexist. I just needed to see his IQ score for what it is: an invitation to challenge my assumptions about what giftedness means and to educate myself about my son鈥檚 needs.

I received my son鈥檚 IQ score by accident. I shouldn鈥檛 have been surprised; after all, I hired a psychologist to have him assessed. She told me that she was going to give him a test to 鈥渟ee how he learns.鈥 She was, after all, an expert, and I needed help. I had no idea that this was her euphemism for an IQ test.

I contacted the psychologist when my son was in kindergarten. He was multiplying and dividing large 鈥渄efense鈥 and 鈥渁ttack鈥 points while 鈥渄ueling鈥 with his older brother during Yu-Gi-Oh games. At the same time, my son鈥檚 intense nature took a turn for the worse. He cried every day on the walk to school. The timing of these two events made me wonder if his mathematical talent was connected to the distress he experienced on the way to school. It seemed coincidental, but I wasn鈥檛 sure.

My husband and I talked about what to do. I thought he should be tested. I had no idea what he should be tested for, but I was sure that there was some sort of test that could help me better understand my son. My husband made a prophetic statement. He said, 鈥淏efore you get him tested, you should know what you are going to do with the information.鈥 I thought he was crazy. How could I know what to do听before I got the results?

When I听received the results, I still had no idea what to do with them. Everyone else, however, thought they knew exactly what they meant and what I should do. According to my friends, my son was 鈥渃ream,鈥 as in 鈥渢he cream will rise to the top.鈥 Homework would be easy, GPAs would be high, and I didn鈥檛 need to do anything. The teachers at my son鈥檚 public school seemed to agree with this assessment. Their idea of differentiating the curriculum for him required no work on their part. They assigned projects and expected my son to extend and enhance them on his own. I call this type of differentiation 鈥渟mart kids will act smart.鈥 He didn鈥檛 oblige, so I changed tactics.

I swung wildly to the other extreme and took full responsibility for ensuring that the promise indicated by the number was realized. We hired tutors and subscribed to online learning courses. We enrolled him in an independent school for gifted children. After all, if the IQ number represented my son鈥檚 ability, then a subpar GPA or SAT score would reflect an inadequate educational or family environment, right? This view of his IQ score fit my “middle child” sense of responsibility perfectly. It just wasn鈥檛 true.

The substantial resources we directed to my son鈥檚 education turned out to be money and time well spent, though not exactly for the reasons I expected. I was not guaranteeing excellence; I was addressing challenges. I needed to reevaluate my assumptions about my son鈥檚 education much the same way that parents with children who have learning differences need to adjust their expectations about their children鈥檚 needs.

It turns out that his emotional intensity is connected to his gifted intellect. His sensitivity to sensory stimulation exhausted him and made him irritable. His aptitude for pattern recognition caused him to overcomplicate simple tasks. His classmates鈥 reaction to his developmental asynchrony caused him to 鈥渄umb-down鈥 his performance. When we changed his environment, he found peers who were similarly excited about learning and teachers who understood his occasional outbursts and celebrated his creative problem solving. He developed new passions and let some of his anxieties go.

With the help of organizations like the 听that study and support gifted children, I learned about my son鈥檚 needs. I still get it wrong, and it鈥檚 those stories I like to听share because I learn more from my failures than my successes. As part of the gifted community, I think it is our responsibility to share our stories so that we feel less isolated. So, I鈥檒l start with this story, because I am, above all, very responsible.

What was your experience when you first found out your child is gifted? Please share with us in the comment section听below!

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